BLISS RATING: ★★★★+
“I’ll be with you. I’ll be with you until you die. I’ll stay even after you die.” – Quote from Kinou Nani Tabeta?
The quote above sums up beautifully what these sets of series and movies are all about. After finishing Season 1, the movie New Year’s Special 2020, the 2021 movie, and most recently Season 2, I now feel lost and a bit melancholic; like I have lost a circle of friends. I have gotten to know these characters and feel sad now that they will not be a part of my watching milieu anymore. This is one of the few series that has a real longitudinal character development. A study not just for the main personalities but for all the supporting characters as well. It truly is a beautifully crafted and filmed anthology.
I hesitate to call it a ‘BL’ but it really is; it is of a much older couple and obviously not meant for the mass audience in the BL world. Too bad. They would learn a thing or two about living and about love if they watched this as it ponders and deals with the topic we never want to hear in BL and that is – aging. And how it affects and changes and defines and, in this case, strengthens love.
I watched these stories in totem and would recommend you do so as well, if possible. One can then grasp the full understanding of what transpires. It is not possible to summarize these stories simply; all one can do is give an impression of its impact on you, the watcher.
While the story revolves around the relationship of an older couple, it is so so much more than that. Kakei Shiro (Nishijima Hidetoshi) and Yabuki Kenji (Uchino Seiyou) are both well into their 40s and are steep in Japanese culture. Shiro is an uptight lawyer, rigid in his thinking, terrified of being overtly gay, certainly closeted, although his family knows. He is frugal to the point of being labeled a ‘penny-pincher’ and sticks rigidly to sets of rules and budgets.
Kenji, on the other hand, is a bit more extravagant and sort of ‘open’ in his gayness. He is a hairdresser. Never hiding it and yet does try to fit into the societal norms and desperately tries to fit in with what Shiro wants to keep things orderly. Over the course of their relationship, we see that Shiro changes more so. Sometimes, more subtlety but steadily, into how Kenji thinks and behaves. The two begin to mesh and blend and honestly act more like a married couple than most married couples.
It would seem that food is their center of attention. And this series does a masterful job of almost making it feel like you are watching a cooking show, what with its almost step-by-step instructions on how to cook many meals. But it is the finished product that is really the aim and goal. It is their sitting down, eating and being together that is reinforcing, not the food. Food is only the means to the end; not the end to the means. In essence, their love for one another grows exponentially as much as the complexities of the meals do. It is a thing of beauty to watch.
Along the way, is a cast of characters, that almost become caricatures but do not. They sometimes feel unreal, yet you find yourself compelled to watch them and wanting to be in the same room with them and understand why they have developed such a kinship with one another. It is soft, subtle but so beautiful.
Their closest friends, if you will, is another gay couple of such odd magnitude that I had a hard time rapping my brain around their relationship. Kohinata Daisaku (Yamamoto Koji) is a stunningly and strikingly handsome well build older man who maintains a rather odd and intense relationship with a much younger also astonishingly handsome man nicknamed Gilbert (Isomura Hayato). Gilbert seems to act and behave with no filters and borders on being abusive towards Daisaku. It is a relationship I have seen in other Japanese BLs and will never understand its toxic attractiveness, but it seems that Daisaku thrives on the abuse and is fully cognizant of what is happening, and it appears to work for them. I simply do not understand it, but in a weird way it works, and I can honestly say, that they apparently love each other deeply, as the back story tells us.
The stories of both Kenji’s family and Shiro’s family are both touching, poignant and profoundly moving. I was so moved by these scenes that I needed more than several tissues to wipe away the tears. Although I am not Japanese, I could still relate to the profound growth that both families showed as they grappled with that acceptance of Shiro and Kenji’s relationship as it deepened as they also grew older. It truly ought to be required watching for all families trying to contend with gay men in a relationship and the silly idealized notion of families that children will take care of you in your old age. And replace that with the reality that that possibility might not occur in all instances.
Who really S.T.O.L.E. this series? No one person stands out, yet each gives the performance they were meant to give. You could not ask for a better ensemble cast of characters than these. They all slip in, sometimes unnoticed, and then contribute, and move on out. As it should be. However, if I am forced to make a choice my personal preference as to who struck me with such character force is Isomura Hayato as Gilbert because he is so layered as a character. Overtly in your face one minute and then quite vulnerable the next. Sad and happy, sometimes almost simultaneously. He is a complex figure who wants to be loved but is almost afraid to return it for fear of losing it. Again, seemingly strong but weak. Gilbert is smart, calculating but so fragile that you cannot help but feel sorry for him. I found his character to be utterly fascinating and mesmerizing and frankly adorably cute. I almost admire Daisaku for putting up with him as he is like a fine, exquisite piece of porcelain – beautiful to look at but so easy to break or crack.
This is a slow-paced middle-aged BL journey, if such a thing existed. There are no serious dramas or issues to arise that hinder the storytelling. It is just a good-old-fashioned commentary of how love develops. Certainly not out of lust but out of companionship which then turns into a deeper sense of connection to one another that has to be considered love. It centers around Shiro and him secretly knowing that Kenji is not ‘really his type’ but realizing that Kenji is so deeply and profoundly in love with him that nothing else matters. Hence the quote above is Kenji’s expression to Shiro. To see this love grow is worth the journey.
Now for its criticism, which I realize is sensitive. I thought that Uchino Seiyou as Kenji just did not ‘feel’ right to me. He seemed a bit too gay and in a closed and repressed society, I can only imagine the difficulties that would have created in real life. You could sense the ‘outward’ acceptance, but ‘inward’ was a different matter, e.g. Shiro’s mother’s reaction when she meets Kenji. His movements just did not seem natural to me and were a bit too flamboyant. The other drawback I had was the lack of any physicality of love between them. Certainly, I was not searching for any lustful scenes, but not even a hand holding or even a kiss on the cheek.
Nothing that even remotely indicates that these two men had any type of physical connection to their love and therefore without any even remote hint that sex of any type was even mentioned, discussed, thought of, or even hinted, I concluded that their relationship was nothing more than a platonic one. I am not judging or concluding that this is inappropriate.
Two people can decide how they want to spend their lives together in whatever way they want. It just seems that a big part of why we are human has been excluded from their lives for reasons I could not fathom, and that part was disappointing and should have been addressed. It was not.
On the other hand, one could easily conclude that Gilbert and Daisaku because they are way more animated and connected to each other, no doubt had an active sexual life together. At least, that is my projection. They seemed more content whereas Shiro and Kenji (perhaps more so from him) always seemed like something was missing from the relationship. It did not take away from his love, but it would have enhanced it even more had there been physicality to their relationship. All speculation on my part, of course.
None of this matters or should weigh on whether or not you should take the time to watch these series/movies. It is a worthy way to spend your time as you will see two imperfect older men come to grips with getting older, slowly grow to love one another more deeply, and enjoy each other’s company mainly around the dinning room table. They would and I would conclude that their lives are content. Perhaps there is nothing better than that.
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