BLISS RATING: ★★★★+
“I wonder if the future is just an endless series of losses.” – Quote from Life In Smokey Blue
This is an astonishing difficult series to categorize. While it falls technically under the general umbrella of the definition of “BL”, it certainly is not fashioned by characters who are traditionally composed of individuals identified as typical protagonists. How we see this saga is important because the story must be defined for what it truly is. It is a gay romance story’s reflection of the sad reality of what happens to BL type characters when they get older. When their ‘cuteness’ has left them and they begin to become part of the ordinariness of humanity, entering and leaving now without anyone turning their heads to look at them. It does not mean that they have lost their beauty; they have not. It simply means it has turned inward where internal beauty now outweighs the external beauty to function in a society.
This unfolding of the story of two men will not move mountains but it will present a reality that for many is what is happening to them. It is a transition of them getting older and the realization that they are gay and are now coming to terms with it and learning to accept its reality. In a society that still does not accommodate it. Each must take their individual journey down a very lonely path. But the beauty of this legendry is that their paths once crossed when they were younger, intersected again when they are older. And their joint path may now be going down the same road together. Softly, gently. Each holds the hand of the other and along the way, they are inviting trusted friends and family members to join them in their peaceful journey to seeking a life of fulfillment together. This is a wonderfully rich story in exploring the beauty of living life together, taking pleasures with being with one another, and knowing that the other person is exactly where you are as well.
Like many of us, Azuma Sakutaro (Takeda Kouchei) was successful. He was an up-and-coming pharmaceutical sales representative. Having just taken over for an equally successful representative named Kuji Shizuka (Shibuya Kento). In a twist of fate, before Kuji left the company, he and Azuma spent one night together in a passionate embrace. Never seeing each other again until a twist of fate places them back together some 8 years later.
Unfortunately, Azuma, now 38, quit work, as he was beginning to have a mid-life crisis where he felt everyone else was moving ahead and onward, while he stagnated. Now he lives with his sister and goes to the gay bar in the evenings.
One evening, Kuji walks into the same bar and sees that the man that Azuma is with, spike his drink. While that man was trying to drag him home, Kuji rescues Azuma from what surely would have ended up being a certain unpleasant forced encounter. When Azuma sobers up, he realizes who rescued him and a journey, frankly that neither one was expecting to take, begins. It is a journey of self-discovery that in essence sets them off on new career paths and a life-long commitment to being together.
Along their journey is a cast of characters who influence them. Some directly while others provide a sort of respite along the way. A few merely nourish them as a couple while others provide them with a ‘reflection’ into their individual minds of who they are and what they are, as nature’s gift to the world. Surprisingly, perhaps none more important to them than Azuma’s nephew, Morimoto Tamaki (Yamamoto Ryuto).
Who really S.T.O.L.E. this series? There is an astonishing poignant scene between Morimoto and his uncle and Kuji. All along, Azuma maintained a close and strong relationship with his nephew, Morimoto Tamaki portrayed stunningly by Yamamoto Ryuto. From an early age, Morimoto sensed his uncle was different and perhaps why and, in a way, admired his uncle for being different. When it was time for Kuji and Azuma to be honest about their relationship now that Morimoto has become an adult, he weeps when he is told. Not because he is shocked but because, as he said, he had hoped they would be like this. In that moment, he summed up his understanding and acceptance of who his uncle was and the relationship he had with his partner, Kuji. Morimoto knew. He no longer had to hide behind nuances or decorum to feel comfortable with them. He could be himself and they could be themselves with him. Yamamoto Ryuto as the character of Morimoto conveys acceptance of gayness with quiet, unobtrusive warmth, making it feel open, natural, and wholehearted. He embraced them as an act of normalcy. It all felt so unpretentious and unconditional. And now, he has been introduced as an adult into this world as its newest member that has the capacity to change the old ways. His quiet acceptance moved mountains. Morimoto made Kuji weep with joy, highly uncharacteristic of him to be that emotional. If you want to watch magic in acting, then watch Yamamoto Ryuto’s portrayal of this unassuming role. Not only were the characters Kuji and Morimoto wiping away tears of joy, but I am also sure those watching were as well. That included myself as it is one of the most emotionally powerful scenes in a BL I have ever seen. Morimoto represents the death of the old guard. Yamamoto Ryuo made it look like this transition would be an easy one for the younger generation. I am counting on Morimoto, the character, and Yamamoto, the person, to change their worlds – quietly but firmly.
If you are seeking hosannas from heaven, you will be disappointed. This is a slow-burn, dare a say, courtship. These two men are middle-age, worn-down by life, and are not the raving Adonises so much associated with BL series. Their romance is measured, methodical, and incremental. Revealed in stages to people that they trust and in a sense they know will lead to a measured steady acceptance. While they grapple with learning to be ‘gay’, they are, despite what seems like an acceptance of who they are with themselves, still wanting and needing that validation from their society. So, they ‘out’ themselves, with firmness yet only to those they trust will be tolerant of them and continue to treat them for who they are.
What we are presented with are slices-of-life that help establish their relationship. Thus, we get a sense of fulfillment at the end that Kuji and Azuma will be together until the end of their days. Their confessions of love to one another are almost backhanded and are reached and logically surmised with each other with an odd sense of deductible logic. Initially starting out as an attraction, then morphs into survival, then lust, drifting into necessity, and finally settling into an acceptance that a kind of love exists between the two of them. How it is defined is not relevant; it just is. In the end, the realization is that they need and more importantly, want each other.
What disappointed me, slightly, but evidently, is the lack of passion between the two, which might be oxymoronic thinking on my part. While they surprisingly showed more than I was actually expecting, when it came to the personal intimacy of kissing, it fails. I wanted and expected more. Kuji and Azuma broke all the rules in the creation of their unorthodox relationship except this one. What we get is the traditional hesitancy that is standard in all Japanese BLs. The treating of personal intimacy (like kissing) is taboo still. These guys had no issues with having sex nor expressing their desire for one another to others, including relatives, yet hesitated and make the actual exchange of intimacy feel taboo and dirty. I felt cheated. I honestly thought these guys would break that stereotypical behavior awkwardness. I felt disappointed. I do not know why; I just did.
This story is deeply reflective of what happens to many, many middle-age gay couples everywhere. Their lives might not seem glamorous as these are the ones who are generally not featured in the idealized versions of the BL world. Most who watch BLs also never think about how the beauty will fade from the enchanters they are currently fantasizing over and their issues will soon evolve into general life’s issues with all its mundaneness that will weigh them down as well, and they will become future Kujis and Azumas. That is this drama’s real message.
This narrative dissects what happens to quiet, average gay guys who live ordinary lives. It teaches us to appreciate the beauty of ordinariness.
Do not let this series pass you by because it is not flashy. It really represents the heart-and-soul of a gay relationship.
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