BLISS RATING: ★★★★
“Someone who truly loves you, sees what a mess you can be, how moody you can get and how hard you can be to handle. BUT STILL WANTS YOU.” – Your Tango
I am probably not allowed to say this, but I actually liked this series – a lot. It was mercilessly panned for being perhaps uneventful. Ironically, that is what I liked about it. I also found it to be way more complex than most realized. The complexity of the story lies in its characters themselves; not the story content.
Aiyaret [Ai] (Meen Khajornborirak) is attending a university in Canada but has been expelled from the school and Ai’s father has ordered him to come back home to Thailand to complete his education. Even here, the story turns interesting. His father, Sippakorn (Porsch Apiwatsayee) is in a long-standing relationship with another man named Jaonan (Arm Panatkool). And both have raised Ai since he was a child and in essence Ai has two fathers. Jaonan is a force to be reckoned with. More on that later.
On Ai’s first day back to college in Thailand, he is completely and utterly smitten with Chen Nhai (Save Saisawat). It begins with Ai recovering Nhai’s lost duck key chain, which for him is precious and holds a special connection to his father. While completely fixated on it Nhai is constantly losing it. Because they happen to be in the same class, so begins their journey. Nhai, is a very odd and unorthodox individual. Superficially, he is what we might call ‘ditzy’. Yet I hate using that term as he most assuredly is not. He is forgetful, gets lost quite easily, and seems at times to be very unfocused. He is disheveled and shares little common skills with the rest of the world.
However, when he is with it, he is laser-sharp and focused. When Ai invited Nhai and his gang of friends over to his place, they all got drunk and in a drunken weak moment, Nhai confesses how he sees and feels about Ai. While Ai tried hard not to succumb to Nhai’s whims, he could not overcome them. They have sex. Passionately. If anything, Ai’s feelings for Nhai simply deepen and intensify. He became even more smitten by him. So, their courtship begins with a lustful sexual encounter.
The problem is that Nhai is not gay and while having engaged, under his own volition, in gay sex with Ai, he becomes confused. He is unsure of himself and who he is now. Nhai realizes also that the feelings he has for Ai is all the same excitement as being in ‘love’. Ai immediately confesses his likeness for Nhai which further intensifies Nhai’s anxieties. But the two of them are unable to stop the deepening feelings they have for each other. Nhai is willing to try and give it a month to see if this can all work. And the story revolves around their month-long expedition to finding out if this is at all workable.
Ironically, Nhai knows himself on a much deeper level than is given credit for. He tries to warn Ai that he is ‘difficult’. That is an understatement to be sure. Nhai is insecure, has odd habits, moody, quirky, self-centered, unwilling to change, and overly demanding. He sets up situations so they literally become self-fulfilling prophesies so he can tell Ai, “See I told you I am impossible.” It becomes a test for Ai to see if he can tolerate all Nhai’s ideocracies and foibles. There are not artificially set up roadblocks here to stumble their relationship. Nor are there any major crises. It is just the journey of discovering each other’s frailties that tests their relationship.
This is a study on how far the insecurities and fear of one partner can thwart the feelings of the other partner. Through all his testing, whining, and demands, Nhai falls deeper and deeper in love with Ai. And rather than Ai being pushed away, only sees this as a challenge to win Nhai’s heart and to prove to him that he is not going anywhere and will always be with him. Both unquestionably fear losing the other and this month-long trail is to see and show that no matter what is thrown at them, they are in love with each other and are soulmates in the truest form of the meaning of that term.
Who really S.T.O.L.E. this series? What made this series even more interesting was the fact that Ai’s father is in a loving, stable relationship with another man and has been for some time. His partner Jaonan, played by Arm Panatkool, is one of the most fascinating characters in this whole series. Although soft spoken, there is a command about him that tells you he is the ruler of the household. Arm plays this part with such a sense of security and dominion that I found him formidable. His presence is felt. You will do exactly as he tells you to do without him ever having to raise his voice or lift a finger. You just know what you need to do. He takes a liking to Nhai immediately and Nhai to him. Perhaps because they have similar personalities and a presence. When Arm as Jaonan comes into a room, you feel it, sense it and see his control. Mostly through visual cues. In an ironic twist, individuals who know Jaonan say that Nhai looks like him and perhaps there is a grain of truth to that statement. You can also feel Nhai’s aura in a room although not as refined as Joanon’s. But time will tell.
What made this series stand out is that it really is not your typical Thai BL. To be sure, there are no dramatics in this series. It is just the slow mundane picture of these two developing their relationship. It also dispelled a notion that I long held about Thailand’s gay men (in BLs, that is). That they are incapable of saying what they mean or even communicating in general. This series dispelled that. It was so refreshing to see that they actually talked to each other. Reasoned with each other. Became vulnerable with each other. And showed their inherent weakness in who they were to beg the question, “Do you still want to be with me, after all of this?” That is its beauty and that is its point. Thailand can make a BL that is not full of obfuscation or miscommunication or no communication. And do so without a lot of artificial drama or feigned obstructions to thwart a relationship.
One other interesting point about this series that makes it unique is that Ai’s mother (Wae Soul) is the antagonist here. A rather bad chameleon, she tries to thwart the relationship between Ai and Nhai. In an ironic sense, the very thing she tried to accomplish is the very thing that finalized their relationship. Nhai holds his own against her and indeed unhesitatingly tells her he will stand up to her shenanigans if she tries to break them up again. Thus, the relationship is now sealed.
For all of that, this series needs to be applauded and given another look.
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